It's worse to finish than to start all over and never let it lie.

Because when you get too attached, you will find yourself being lost.

Being through ups and downs, learnt my lesson. Constantly reminding myself this and that. I saved myself from heartache's. And boy, ain't I glad I did. Its harder for me to actually feel something, anything at all. As much as I crave to have someone to stay by me. The fear of losing people close to me is simply unbearable. I'm always armed with "what if's" "maybe" and I can't help it. Its better to be safe than sorry though. 

Its like a cycle, a roller coaster, a big spin. And now, I'm back to square one. Regrets, so what if there's regrets? Do or don't, there's bound to have regret's whatsoever. I have come to live with it. Living with regrets. The past won't come back and I am not looking forward to the future. Not at all. What is there to look forward to? Life is just a fucking cycle. Everything is repeating themselves repeatedly. Its just with the different person, different cast, different story. But the ending is always the same. People come and go. Who will really come into your life and make an effort to stay? Nobody. Who gonna be there when you fuck things up? Nobody. Who gonna be there for you? Nobody. Who gonna help you up when you fall? Nobody. Who can you really rely on? Nobody. Who can you call for help? Nobody. The only person you have throughout is yourself. Harsh but the truth. Independent is what I practice through the hard way. And I'm glad I did. Its painful, yes. But its for the better. There's no warning who gonna leave you next. I no longer want to feel the pain when someone parted from me. They left but they didn't take all those memories away. That is what hurt the most. Memories. Feelings, things, photos or even places you once shared with this person. Its still lingers somehow. Its just take someone new to replaced all those memories and another person to replace it all over again. Isn't it like a cycle? Going round and round. Tired. Mentally worn out but there is just this something that keep us from going. Knowing that it never last, it would be the same, it will eventually ends but we just simply won't give up. Why? Because all of us hope for the better, hoping the next one would be better than the last. And the cycle repeats. Yes, repeats. There, its a cycle once again. See what I mean? 

Try making me believing in your lies, try sugar coating your words, try all you might. I will never believe a single thing/words people says. I'm sorry but time will prove every single thing. Words are nothing, actions prove everything. Everyone know this but people barely bother to prove it. And soon, we began to take things for granted. We start to neglect everything around us. And everything, everyone starts to disappear as I slowly fade out.
KO.

On nights like this, procrastination kicks in. 

What is there to say when there is nothing left to say? 

I used to love you.

Enough said.